It’s a very uncertain time for us all, with many of us becoming anxious about the changes being encouraged in our daily lives. For a child that has already suffered bereavement, you may find them to be additionally anxious with the media focussing so heavily on the topic of Coronavirus and potential death.

Here are some steps you can take to try to reduce their anxiety:

• Focus on what you CAN control. Write down their worries and discuss what you can do to reduce them. For example, if your child is worried that their relative may contract coronavirus or die, help them to understand what you can do as a family by following NHS guidelines. https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/coronavirus-covid-19/

Reassure that these measures aren’t forever, but just for now.

• Explain to children that there are lot of people who have recovered from Coronavirus and not everybody will die from it. Most people have a temperature and cough so will need to be treated to relieve the symptoms. It’s mostly dangerous/concerning to people who have other health problems and that’s why we need to stay away from them for now.
• If someone is not considered high risk – explain this to them and why. If they are considered high risk, what are the measures in place to look after them?

We can never promise a child that someone won’t die, but we can help them understand how LIKELY it is.

• It may reassure children to speak to their loved ones. Phone calls and video calls will not only show your child that their loved one is ok, but for those who are self –isolating it will cheer them up.
• There are lots of websites and apps which can help with mindfulness such as calm, headspace or https://www.getselfhelp.co.uk/apple.htm
• Try to avoid the phrase, ‘don’t worry about it.’ Instead, try to give accurate, age appropriate information. Of course we don’t want our children to worry, but the clearer their understanding is, the less they will need to worry. What they don’t understand, they will look up on the Internet or their imagination will create.
• Try not to show panic or fear in front of children. They will pick up on the feelings of those they trust most.
• Ensure they are only taking on news from respectable sources. Explain that the media usually only focusses on negative things, not positive. Can you make a list of 5 good things that have happened in the last week?
• Discuss normal every day and positive things, especially before bedtime. Perhaps read a book so they go to sleep thinking of positive things.
• Where possible, try to stick to routine as this can help children feel safe.
• We are being encouraged to social distance for all of the right reasons, but can you have a little fun with it?! Ask your children what they would like to do and try some new ideas. Arts and crafts, films, playing in the garden etc.
• Above all, do nice things for yourselves and for others. This is a very challenging time for us all, but it can also be a learning experience. A chance for your children to learn how we can all come together to help each other in a time of need.

@richardjarmy – www.richardjarmy.co.uk

Nelson’s Journey reveal new educational bereavement resource

Nelson’s Journey has recently launched a new educational resource with support from Wymondham based toy manufacturer Orchard Toys Ltd. The Smiles & Tears resource will help young people to better understand the impact a significant bereavement can have on their peers, and encourage children and young people to talk about their feelings and views regarding the subject of death, dying and bereavement.

The ‘Smiles and Tears’ resource is a team based discussion tool aimed at groups of young people aged 10-17. It is structured similarly to a traditional board game, with teams moving their pieces around a large vinyl matt and considering discussion and question cards relating to the journey of young people following the death of a special person. Teams reflect on how bereaved children and young people may feel and react in different situations whilst also educating them in how to support peers who may have had a similar experience.

The idea was generated by the Nelson’s Journey Youth Panel and young volunteers when they were discussing how Nelson’s Journey could develop new approaches to support Norfolk’s bereaved children and young people. One young volunteer had been involved in an educational project taken into schools regarding the criminal justice system and felt that a similar approach could work around bereavement.

Jack was 11yrs when his Mum died, reflecting on his time when at high school he said “I was new to my school and we were playing a game to get to know each other. Another pupil said “If you have a Mum, stand-up” I stayed sitting down and my teacher said “Why haven’t you got up, you are cheating”, I explained that I don’t have a Mum and that she had died and he said “well you did have one, so stand up”. I was really angry and my Dad ended up speaking to the school and the teacher apologised. I think the new resource will help young people and school staff to better understand how they can support bereaved young people like me.”

Simon Wright, Chief Executive at Nelson’s Journey said “We need to break through the taboo of talking about death and grief, and support young people to feel comfortable in having those conversations. We’re grateful for the support of Orchard Toys and proud of our young volunteers and staff who have worked hard to create a resource that will encourage those conversations. We believe that this is the only resource of its kind in the UK”.

Ali Brown, Marketing Manager at Orchard Toys says “We are very proud to have been involved in developing this innovative resource with the Nelson’s Journey Youth Panel and young volunteers. It has been a pleasure to work with the Nelsons Journey team, on a resource that is very different in topic and style to our traditional educational games. Our design team have been very passionate about the project and have worked hard to create a resource that looks engaging and will encourage children and young people to participate.”

Schools and youth groups can register their interest in using the Smiles & Tears resource with young people by emailing enquiries@nelsonsjourney.org.uk or by calling 01603 431788

Leah was supported by Nelson’s Journey following her Dad, Lawrence ending his life whilst working away in Singapore.

The impact of being bereaved in such circumstances is significant with family members and friends left with many questions. Leanne, mother of Leah chose to be open and honest with her and her siblings which helped Leah to process accurate information which is so important for bereaved children and young people.

We are pleased to announce an exciting new partnership project between Nelson’s Journey and Norfolk Scouts.  The aim of the project is to give bereaved children and young people, living in Norfolk, the opportunity to experience the positive benefits of Scouting.  The idea originally came from one of Nelson’s Journey young volunteers, as they felt meeting peers though the medium of Scouting was a great way to help children feel they are not alone.

The project will involve the setting up of 1^st Smiles Scout Group which will be open to all children and young people referred to Nelson’s Journey who are already involved in Scouting or who may wish to join Beavers, Cubs, Scouts and Explorer Scouts.

Both organisations are always striving to find new and innovative ways to engage children and young people in positive activities, which will hopefully improve children’s mental health and emotional wellbeing.   The project will offer the opportunity for children and young people to take part in fun and enjoyable activities, as well as meet others who have experienced bereavement.’

Simon Wright, Chief Executive of Nelson’s Journey, said: “By working with Norfolk Scouts, we can pursue new ways of bringing back smiles to Norfolk’s bereaved children. Many of the children and young people that we work with benefit enormously from meeting with others of a similar age who are also bereaved, and understanding that they are not alone in their experiences. The 1^st Smiles Scout Group will provide an excellent opportunity to help young people to build their self-esteem and learn new skills, while meeting others who have experienced the death of a special person.”

Matthew Burrell, County Commissioner for Norfolk Scouts, said: “We’ve been really excited about the prospect of working together with Nelson’s Journey. Both our organisations have at our heart the purpose of enabling young people to develop relationships, help each other and become more resilient. Nelson’s Journey supports children and young people when they are at their most vulnerable, there is an absolute opportunity for the Scouts to help out providing safe spaces to learn new skills, build their unique character and mix with others as they map out their new futures.”

We are very excited to announce a golf day to support Nelson’s Journey and Leeway being held at Eaton Golf Club on Sunday 23rd September.

We would love to encourage anyone who wants to come along and bring a team – female and junior teams are very welcome too! Teams of 4 cost £160 and include breakfast, 18 holes and a 2 course dinner. If you’d like to come along, please get in touch – admin@leewaynwa.org.uk or 0300 561 0077.